WonketteSpeaker Paul Ryan Finally Letting Donald Trump Have His Way With Himwonkette.com - Evan HurstWe don't accept him without face hair, nope. Poor pitiful House Speaker Paul Ryan! He's supposed to be the sane Republican savior to herd all the …
WonketteBen Carson Will Defund Commie Liberal Colleges, Because Freedomwonkette.com - Doktor ZoomThe sleepiest little candidate You have to love Ben Carson's commitment to fight the forces of Political Correctness, because he knows the greatest …
WonketteDonald Trump Cool With Shutting Down Mosques Full Of Muslim Bearswonkette.com - Doktor ZoomTo be sure, the gay bears tend not to be too overt at mosques Speaking to steaming bag of badger innards Stuart Varney on the Fox Business network, …
WonketteJesus Endorses Mike Huckabee For President, Sends All Other Candidates To Hellwonkette.com - Evan HurstThis picture terrifies us, but it came fromhere (IMAGE CREDIT!) so blame them. Hey there, fundamentalist Christian fuckweasels, how ya doing? Confused …
WonketteTrump And Carson Beg Obama's G-Men To Protect Them From Bad Guyswonkette.com - Doktor ZoomGuess this makes them serious candidates. In normal presidential elections, it wouldn't be particularly noteworthy that the top candidates have …
WonketteEverybody Hates Ted Cruz: George W. Bush Editionwonkette.com - Evan HurstExcept just after that the monkey threw him off the cliff. It is a well-known fact that there is nobody in the world who REALLY loves Ted Cruz. All …