The Creepy Truth About Chupacabras

While there might be a number of modern mythological beasts stalking our woods, mountains, oceans, and rivers, most of them don't have sinister intentions. Sure, it'd be scary if Nessie poked her head over the water, or if Bigfoot wandered into your yard. But honestly, the worst thing a big ape is going to do is accidentally topple your mailbox, or maybe stare into your windows.

The odds are pretty good that at some point in your life, you've been gathered around a campfire with friends trading stories about all the specters and monstrosities that could lurk out of the woods and consume your supple young flesh bits. There's the Hook Handed Man, an American classic. There are ravenous cryptids, reported secondhand but never captured on film, like Bigfoot and werewolves and the chupacabra and the small vampire that controls Mark Zuckerburg's steam-powered skin suit. And of course, there's the Wendigo.

If you've done a couple road trips across the United States, there's a strong chance you've spotted a jackalope or two. Not bouncing around, of course, but go to enough sketchy bars, mountain hotels, or rugged ski lodges, and you'll eventually see one of these cryptid creatures mounted on a wall.

Myths are called myths for a reason — because they're untrue. Myths are stories told by ancient people who wanted to explain a phenomenon or scare someone into good behavior, and because we're so much more rational than our ancestors were, we modern humans know better than to believe in them. Most of us, anyway. (We're looking at you, Bigfoot hunters.)

If you happen to find yourself in New Jersey's Pine Barrens, keep an eye out. Did you see any cloven hoofprints? Hear any strange flapping in the night, or a "bloodcurdling scream," perhaps? Hopefully not, because the Garden State locals have spent a few centuries chatting it up about a cryptozoological creature which, these days, usually goes by the friendly name of the Jersey Devil. And no, it has nothing to do with hockey.