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Trump Says Sun Equally to Blame for Blocking Moon

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Attacking the media for its “very unfair” coverage of Monday’s solar eclipse, Donald J. Trump said on Saturday that the sun was equally to blame for blocking the moon.<p>“The fake news is covering the eclipse from the sun’s side instead of the moon’s side, but if you …

In January, President Trump vowed to hire 5,000 new Border Patrol agents. It never happened

Five days after President Trump took office, he signed an executive order that promised a swift, sharp crackdown on illegal immigration — immediate construction of a massive border wall, quick hiring of 5,000 new Border Patrol agents and stepped-up deportation of undocumented migrants.<p>"Beginning …

What the world would look like if all the ice melted

If the world keeps burning fossil fuels and releasing carbon emissions indefinitely, climate change will eventually melt all the ice at the poles and …

10 year-old trips into million-year-old fossil discovery in New Mexico

A family outing turned into a major archaeological discovery by one New Mexico 10-year-old who literally stumbled on a million-year-old fossil.<p>Jude Sparks was hiking the rugged New Mexico desert some five miles east of Las Cruces by the majestic Organ Mountains in November with his parents Kyle and …

Jessica Simpson Marks Her Birthday with Topless Pool Photo: 'Kiss My Butt 36'

Happy birthday, Jessica Simpson!<p>The singer-turned-fashion mogul celebrated her 37th birthday on Monday with a cheeky photo of herself in the …

Shocking report claims fake news is remarkably cheap to produce

Fake news is a very real problem, one that can sway elections and have monumental effects on society. Now, a new cybersecurity research report claims …