Collin Petz

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Trump Says He Is Only President in History with Courage to Stand Up to War Widows

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Calling himself “unbelievably brave,” Donald Trump said on Monday that he is the only President in U.S. history with the courage to stand up to war widows.<p>“You look at guys like Obama and Clinton and the Bushes, when it came to war widows, they all blinked,” he …

Donald Trump just hit a new low in the La David Johnson fiasco

<b>(CNN) —</b> Calling the widow of an American soldier killed in action is, emotionally speaking, absolutely gut-wrenching. Knowing that nothing you will say can bring true comfort. Knowing a life -- and likely many lives -- have been altered forever. Facing down pure loss and pure grief.<p>As difficult as …

Donald Trump

Army Vet: Why Trump Disrespects the Military

As someone who served five years in the United States Army, 14 months of that in combat, I’ve struggled over the past few years to understand Donald …

Donald Trump

A president shouldn't tell an NFL team what to do, Trump tweeted ... in 2013

<b>(CNN) —</b> Over the weekend, President Trump went on a tweet storm directed at players who refuse to stand during the national anthem.<p>One of the posts took aim at the NFL, demanding the league change its policy:<p>"<i>Sports fans should never condone players that do not stand proud for their National Anthem</i> …

Donald Trump

Trump: I dropped Arpaio pardon during Harvey because of ratings

President Donald Trump hit former Presidents Barack Obama and Bill Clinton for their pardons and commutations, while defending his own controversial pardon of former Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio — including the decision to drop the news as Hurricane Harvey was bearing down on Texas.<p>“A lot of …

Donald Trump

Horrifying photos show tragic woman who died after 67 exorcisms because parents thought she was 'possessed by devil'

These chilling photographs show a woman who was exorcised after being convinced 'the devil was inside her'.<p>The haunting case of 23-year-old German …

Exorcism

We've got the sweet little notes Gen. Kelly tucks into Trump's lunchbox every day

President Trump is only human: he needs inspo just like the rest of us.<p>A new report by VICE alleges that aides now give the president two folders …

5 bible passages that prove Trump's advisor is right: God supports Trump 'taking out' Kim Jong-un

It's hard to be surprised by anything in the news that contains the word "Trump" anymore. But this came close.<p>Robert Jeffress, one of President …

Trump says he wouldn't have picked Sessions if he knew he'd recuse himself

<b>Washington (CNN) —</b> President Donald Trump said in an interview published Wednesday that he would not have chosen Jeff Sessions to be his attorney general had he known Sessions would recuse himself over matters related to the 2016 presidential campaign.<p>Trump's remarks, in a 50-minute interview with …

And now, 12 of the best quotes from the Comey hearing

Lordy, seagull, priest — what a day it's been.<p>On Thursday former FBI Director James Comey took the hot seat to testify to the Senate Intelligence …

Donald Trump

'Wonder Woman' does one thing most Marvel movies don't have the guts to do

<b>Warning: There are major spoilers ahead for "Wonder Woman."</b><p>There are numerous reasons why critics are hailing "Wonder Woman." It's a great origin story for young girls that's beautifully shot, and it's genuinely funny. But one of them that truly stands out is a creative choice I was surprised the …

Schwarzenegger to Trump: You can't go back in time. Only I can do that.

It's official: The U.S. is out of the Paris Climate Agreement, courtesy of President Donald Trump. Reactions from all sides are coming in, but one …

Tonight: Trump plagiarized his commencement speech from Elle Woods in Legally Blonde https://t.co/EScE4B02F8

Here Are The Canceled And Renewed TV Shows For 2017-2018

It's the best (and the worst) time of year.<p>For TV fans, spring is a double-edged sword.<p>As the 2016-2017 season wraps up with a slew of highly anticipated season (and series) finales before summer TV doldrums hit, the major networks are determining which shows will make the cut and which shows will …

"Things Jesus Never Said" Is Trending After House Republicans Passed Their Health Care Plan

"Sorry, I would heal you, but leprosy is a pre-existing condition."

TRUMP: 'Why was there the Civil War? Why could that one not have been worked out?'

President Donald Trump asked why the Civil War happened in an interview with the journalist Salena Zito set to air Monday on Sirius XM.<p>"People don't realize, you know, the Civil War, if you think about it, why?" the president said. "People don't ask that question, but why was there the Civil War? …

Here are the search histories of the major Republican lawmakers who think it's okay to sell yours

Republicans in the House of Representatives voted on Tuesday to give internet service providers the ability to sell their users' private data — …

Donald Trump

Legion’s Renewal Shows Fox’s New Approach to Superheroes Is Working

By the end of last year, it felt like the superhero factory was running out of flavors. On screens both big and small, the two biggest brands tasked …

Just 30 of the Best DC Memes

DC fans really like Batman.<p>DC Comics was founded in 1934 by Malcolm Wheeler-Nicholson, a man totally ignorant of the world of internet memes. Since …

Comic Books

Americans Overwhelmingly Say Lives Have Improved Since Kellyanne Conway Went Away

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—An overwhelming majority of Americans say that their lives have improved since Kellyanne Conway went away, a new poll finds.<p>According to the poll, Americans have been sleeping more, eating better, and enjoying a markedly greater sense of well-being following …

How DC Comics Is Making Directors Hate Filmmaking

Ben Affleck was the best part of <i>Batman V. Superman</i>. Sure, his spine-crushing, evil-murdering rendition of the Caped Crusader wasn't perfect, but in a …

Watch Kellyanne Conway's Cringeworthy Stand-Up Routine From 1998 (Video)

Donald Trump adviser performed at charity stand-up event called “D.C.’s Funniest Celebrity”<p>Before she became an adviser to President Donald Trump, …

Donald Trump

A 7-Year-Old's Hilarious (and Heartbreaking) Review of 'Empire Strikes Back'

One young man travels to a galaxy far, far away for the first time — and he has a lot of questions.<p>It's considered the best movie in the greatest …

Luke Skywalker

The Internet Is Roasting Donald Trump Like Never Before In History

Welp, it's been a hell of a day for Donald Trump (and that's <i>really</i> saying something) - after all of the outrageous statements and gaffes, he finally …

The best photos from 2016's spectacular Perseid meteor shower

The night sky was alive with shooting stars on Thursday as people around the globe experienced one of the most active Perseid meteor showers in a …

Alien megastructure star’s strange behaviour can’t be understood with traditional explanations, scientists say

The star that some say has a huge alien megastructure built around it just got even more mysterious.<p>Scientists said last year that the star, named …

Daisy Ridley Was Driven Off Instagram After Posting An Anti-Gun Message

Anyone who has perused <i>Star Wars</i> star Daisy Ridley‘s Instagram account knows that she is a literal Rey of sunshine. Between showing young girls they can be strong with her training videos or sharing messages of kindness and empowerment, Ridley was clearing using her platform for good. However, after …

Social Media

'Largest-ever' new map of universe shows 1.2 million galaxies

A new map reveals our universe is more massive than we realize. Astronomers with the Baryon Oscillation Spectroscopic Survey (BOSS), a Sloan Digital …

Top 50 Netflix movies available now

There are some brilliant award-winning, genre-changing, thought-provoking movies streaming right now on Netflix – UPDATED<p>Struggling to find a movie …